In an alternate universe, I could have spent the entire morning researching an obscure tax issue. Instead, I just spent 45 minutes trying to outbox a bowl of oatmeal, a muffin, and a sausage, egg, and cheese sandwich. (www.frusion.com). I could not defeat the morning time heart attack sandwich.
You'd think that being in the unique position of having received a weiner wakeup, I would not recount the story. Yet last night, I told it to about 10 people I had just met. The weiner wakeup occured during my sophomore year of college when, while in an advanced stage of drunkeness, I passed out in my room with the door open, lights on, music blaring...the whole nine yeards. My very good friends decided to imitate a Steve-O (of Jackass fame) DVD and to strip naked and jump around on the bed until I woke up and they decided to video tape it. So they succeeded in their mission, except one guy tripped when I was covering my face and punching with my other arm and would have struck my face with two certain objects that males posses had I not been covering it. It was a life defining experience. But not my life.
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