Back from Vegas

Well I just got back from Vegas last night and it was one helluva good time. Here, if I can recall correctly are some of the best tales from the trip:
-My friend Bryce does not respond to mocking of any sort, so some how it came up that we would say that Bryce sucked his own dick. Bryce would then fly off the handle and get really angry every time we would say this, to which I would tell him, "Why are you angry, that is a very enviable special talent"...crazy kid

-After I finished my yard long margarita (yes it was really a yard long) I began doing back flips in the pool and singing show tune requests for everyone while also using the very long straw that came with the drink to try and play the instumental parts....I think I then was romanced by a midget or something

-The day we got there I finally had my previously mentioned moustache and we were at a club in our hotel and the guys I was with were being pussies and would not go up to any girls, but since I have a lady friend I don't care I decided to go up to these girls dancing near one another...as I approached the girls ran away...not as if they had to go to the bathroom, but they bolted away as if I were a zombie, or a guy with a creepy ass moustache. Needless to say I shaved it the next day and when were at Studio 54 later in the week I was back to my butt getting grabbed by aimless females sort of way

-Paul and Brian, when they would get drunk during the day and we would be walking through the casino floor, would randomly disappear and we would turn around and see them talking to aimless females, including ones like the one in this picture (http://community.webshots.com/photo/406826368/442841066PMDAzl)...to whom Paul had just said, "You are beautiful"

-After my friends left me alone at the luxurious Boardwalk Casino and my initial $25 at the roulette table had turned into over $200 and many Jack and Cokes later (probably about 12) and then I had no money...I was walking down the strip by myself and stopped at the yard long margarita place and got a smaller one...like a 30 oz. margarita and I was stumbling my way down to Margaritaville....anyways at certain points on the strip they have bridges over the roads so that people do not walk across them and little walls to prevent people from wandering into the street...well drunken Tim decided that he could climb the wall and cross the street...no more than ten seconds later cops were pulling me over and saying over the loudspeaker, "What are you doing, what are you doing?" to which I threw up my hands and said, "Nothing, nothing"...they then explained to me that I had to walk up and over the streets and when they told me such, I reacted as if I were totally unaware of this. Ten seconds later on the bridge there were six ok looking girls walking together and one was wearing a shirt that was only opaque around her mammary region...I slurred to her "That shirt doesn't leave much to the imagination" to which she sluttily replied, "I know, do you like it?" I said, "I guess so" and she began making out with me. I shoved her off after about two seconds and ran away...saying No! NO!...it was really bizarre...once we got to margaritaville I drank about five more beers and then my antics on the way home were even more crazy...they included: trying to hand out the stripper cards with the mexicans, fake figure skating, shouting out "MIKE JONES", and shadow boxing with some man and pointing up at something repeatedly (no one knows what since I do not remember and no one was near me) there are some pictures I can link to this stuff as well...

-MORE TO COME>>>>